Home, hospice, and palliative care options help families
cope with serious illness or at end of life, minimizing the physical, emotional
and financial toll while maximizing comfort and quality of care
As the holiday season draws to a close
and families return home to resume work and school, the days following
Christmas are frequently a time when the question of how to cope with an aging
loved one’s long term illness is no longer a concern for the future.
“January is often the time when family members reassess
the amount and quality of care they can give, versus what Grandma or Grandpa
needs,” says Chris Comeaux, Four Seasons Compassion for Life.
Each family’s situation drives home the increasingly
significant question of how individuals in the wider Buncombe County
metropolitan statistical area cope with the realities of long term illness and
dying.
For individuals like Marie Thompson of Hendersonville,
the issue is up close and personal. Her husband, Russell, 83, has multiple
sclerosis. A 30 year veteran of General Electric, he is now totally paralyzed
on the right with limited ability to walk and stand. The vital man Marie
married now depends on an electric wheel chair to move from room to room in
their home.
“He can dress himself, I put on his shoes and socks,” she
says. “He needs so much assistance, he can’t do for himself. He would never be
able to manage his medicines, fix or get his own food. He’s not safe to leave
in a place without somebody there. MS is very debilitating.”
If Russell falls, she calls the fire department for
assistance to help lift him. And getting him in and out of a car into a fold up
wheel chair for medical appointments is impossible.
Former nurse, Marie Thompson figures she’s better off
than most when it comes to navigating the additional complications of her
husband’s excruciating ruptured disc and surgery, physical therapy, edema, and
the aftermath of congestive heart failure.
“I did know what types of options were available,
probably more than a lay person would,” she says. “For example, medications and
how to give them, things like that, I already knew.”
Still, when Russell’s doctor saw that Marie was having
such a difficult time managing, he told the couple he’d like to refer them to
hospice. Now, instead of travelling to care providers, the care providers come
to their home.
The assistance was a “tremendous relief,” Marie says, as
it helps her manage better emotionally, physically, and financially. Instead of
Russell remaining at home, the other options would include a long term care
facility their insurance wouldn’t cover, finding an assisted living place, or
divesting themselves of their home and assets to qualify for Medicare.
“People are very
kind and they offer to help, but then you don’t know if they mean it, or you
feel guilty if you call and ask,” she says. “That situation is never one I
could accept.”
Aging Is Factor in WNC Illness
The quality of life of aging persons who are seriously
ill and their care-givers is not a new one in western North Carolina.
“The Thomas’ situation is not unlike that of many other
families residing in western North Carolina,” Comeaux says. “In some cases, the
mountainous terrain is an impediment to care. With the holidays behind us,
family members may have become more aware that the need for change is
imminent.”
How do families know when it’s time to ask for help?
Comeaux shares the five common ways families identify their need for
assistance.
1. Watch for patterns of decline. “Are things getting
worse over time, and how much worse?”
2. Family caregiver limits. “Is the family caregiver able
to manage the aspects of care the person who is seriously ill currently needs?”
3. Self-monitoring abilities. “Can the individual manage
his or her own medications, pay their bills, and remember to turn off
appliances after they prepare meals or perform household tasks?”
4. Everyday quality of life. “An active social life and
ability to engage in everyday activities is essential to a person’s well-being.
If this wanes, then it may be time to step in.”
5. Ask for a health needs assessment. “Have you talked
with the individual’s physician to determine whether it’s time to ask for
additional help? The severity of limitations will help identify what level of
assistance is needed.”
For more information about care during serious illness or
at end of life in western North Carolina, contact Four Seasons Compassion for
Life, Flat Rock, at http://www.fourseasonscfl.org.
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